Danielle Cotterell’s life looks perfect, but she says online hate is still a problem in 2025
An influencer from Hull has spoken out against cruel online abuse after being on the receiving end of “mum shaming” posts. Danielle Cotterell’s Instagram feed is full of glamorous holiday snaps and gym selfies but, beneath the surface, she has struggled with her mental health and fought to get where she is today.
The mum-of-three, 37, who lives in Kingswood, has just under 40,000 followers on Instagram. Over the years, she says she has built-up a base of supportive followers, but there are still instances of hateful comments.
Danielle says she often sees critical posts about the bodies of mothers after having a baby, such as “can’t believe mums can’t just lose weight, it is not that hard”. She believes people who abuse others online “want to be something, so they put other people down”.
Recently, she claimed she was the target of more mum shaming after entering a new relationship following her divorce. “One, it affects me mentally and how I live my life and it is speaking about my children, but it also shames other people who do want to go into new relationships after divorce,” she said.
While people “can perceive a perfect life” from social media, the reality is that being a single parent is difficult, she added. “If I had been in the mental place I was in five or 10 years ago, that could be really damaging.
“When you are in that mind of anxiety and intrusive thoughts, people’s opinions – you believe them. I could have read that and really thought, ‘I am not a good enough mum’.
“That is affecting somebody’s life. It is not just a little status on Facebook to get some likes.”
She added: “Obviously, when you do social media, you do get a lot of ups and downs and hate, but over the last couple of years I have got to the place with mine where it is quite supportive. People follow the journey, and I have a lot of good followers.”
Danielle said when she was 21 she had “really bad mental health” and to “get to where I am now” took work. When her first child, Layla, was born, she lived in a high-rise flat in Orchard Park and was struggling with intrusive thoughts.
While she is now in a much stronger place mentally, a thoughtless comment on social media can still hurt. “It is just sad that people can still take that and turn it around and try to bring you down,” she said.
“We are in 2025 and – with women, and social media, and mental health – it is just something that I don’t think should be happening still,” she said. “The shaming of mums is not OK, basically.”
She added: “I started social media in 2019. It was a bigger thing back then and influencers were all new. When we built our lifestyle – me and my ex-husband – you do obviously get the hate and comments.”
Danielle was praised for “realness” for sharing a “no effort” photo of herself when her son was born. But she revealed she’d received negative comments about her pregnancy weight gain too.
She was also called “disgusting hurtful things” and accused of being “no fun” after sharing her decision to give up alcohol. Danielle said most followers are respectful and will say “thank you” for opening up on her experiences with motherhood and mental health.
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